J's Birth Story

This birth story isn't near as exciting and eventful as Owen's. That's a good thing! Except for story telling purposes, it's a little boring. 

The doctor who delivered Owen via emergency c-section told me I'd have to have c-sections for any future births. J's original due date was June 28th, but I knew I'd need to schedule a c-section for an earlier date. I was silently hoping June 21st would be the day, because that's the summer solstice and I thought it would be fun to have a little sun-baby. Luckily, that's the date my doctor suggested, so I was excited about that!

I started having contractions on the 17th. I never felt more than 3 or 4 an hour...nothing too serious, but enough to scare me into having my hospital bag packed a few days early.
My mom flew in on the 19th.
Gavin gave me a blessing on the 20th.
I was told not to eat or drink anything after 10 pm on the 20th, but my doctor told me I could drink a little bit of water if I needed to, then lie about it, so that's exactly what I did!
Luckily, nothing came of the contractions, so we headed to the hospital bright and early on the 21st. 

I was so so anxious about the delivery. My first experience was pretty intense, and I knew it would probably be much more routine this time around, but I still didn't really know what to expect.

We got to the hospital around 5:30 am. I put on my hospital gown and the heart rate monitors and was relieved when everything looked normal. Over the next hour I signed a bunch of papers, met some nurses and doctrs, and got my IV in. It's crazy that everything we did in an hour this time, we did in 5 minutes last time. It was nice to actually be able to process what was happening!
I did feel very nauseas throughout all of this, to the point of asking for a barf bag. The anxiety + the hospital smell + the empty stomach + pregnancy hormones =not a good combination. 

At 7:30 my doctor arrived, Gavin put on his hospital clothes, and we went to the surgery room. It was freeeeezing in there! The anesthesiologist walked me through the spinal block. He said the first shot would probably hurt a little more than a normal shot (he was right!), then I shouldn't be able to feel the second shot (he was right again!). This was the part I was most anxious for, because this was the craziest part of Owen's birth. I'm very grateful that experience wasn't repeated! 

Then I laid down, the sheet went up, and Gavin sat next to my shoulders. My anesthesiologist said that the nurses were there to take care of the baby, but he was there to take care of me and to let him know if I needed anything. Well... it was at this point that I finally needed to throw up. I was already numb, so that poor doctor had to catch my puke and wipe my face and not act horrified! Thank goodness I hadn't eaten anything, but I think my puke gave away that I broke the "no water" rule. Woops!

At 8:06 they asked me if I was ready to see my baby! Gavin stood up to take a peek. I was so happy and relieved when I heard my baby cry. I had to wait a minute before I could actually see him because of the delayed cord clamping or whatever it is that I know nothing about. They finally held him up over the sheet and my first thought was "Oh good, he's cute. and he looks like Owen!" then the nurses took him to get cleaned up and Gavin followed them.

 Gavin's first look at J

My first look at J

Only a mother would look at a messy, crying, fresh-from-the-womb baby and think "cute!" haha 

Right after getting cleaned by the nurses

Stamping Gavin's hospital shirt with J's footprints

Apparently J swallowed a bunch of liquid or something else I know nothing about, so it took the nurses a while to get him all suctioned out. I kept hearing phrases from the nurses like "he looks good, but he's got this toe...". Once he was swaddled, Gavin brought him close to my face to help me hold him. Ahhh it was so exciting. Gavin informed me that our baby looked healthy and had a funky toe. We also noticed a bruise on his shoulder. At first we weren't sure if it was a delivery battle wound, or a birthmark. Turns out it's a birthmark- lots of special features on this little guy of ours!

It took another twenty minutes or so to get me all put back together. I started shaking but was quickly covered in hot blankets and told to let my body shake instead of trying to fight it. The shaking wasn't near as severe as it was last time (there seems to be a theme here) and only lasted 15 minutes. 

We got to the recovery room and the nurse helped me get in a skin-to-skin position with J. It took J all of 5 seconds to start searching for something to eat, so I got to breastfeed him as soon as I could hold him safely. 

We texted our families to let them know everything went well, and that we would Face Time after Owen met his new brother. We thought Owen should do the honors of being the first family member to see that babe!

We finally made it to the hospital room where we'd be staying. The nurses helped me change into a prettier robe, I put on some mascara (if you've seen our first few pictures with Owen, you know I learned the no-mascara lesson the hard way), and let my mom know to come on in! We also had someone there to record Owen meeting his brother for the first time. I'm excited to get that video back!

I'll share more pictures and experiences from the hospital in my next post, but that's the story of J joining our family here on Earth! We're so grateful he's ours!

Author Side

My thoughts used to be much more poetic than they are now. I’m sad to say I’ve grown out of constantly thinking in lyrics or stories. Life’s gotten too busy for me to organize my thoughts in those ways, which is why this morning I was drawn to a talk “The Race of Life” by Thomas S. Monson. This talk was about realizing what really matters; at least that’s what I got out of it. So tonight, Gavin asked me what I wanted to do (and usually when he asks something like this late at night when all I want to do is go to bed, he’s referring to something in the bedroom that isn’t sleeping if you’re catching my drift) and I told him I wanted to sit outside and talk. It was 10:00 pm, Owen was asleep, it was 25 degrees outside, and the sky was extremely clear.  We put hats on, grabbed blankets, and laid on our driveway. We talked about people and places around us, how life is going too fast, and how the shadows on the tree looked like a bearded man’s face. It was so nice to slow down. It got me somewhat reconnected with my author side.

Lately this blog has just been a record. I love it. I love sharing our pictures and updates with friends and family who wouldn’t otherwise see the pictures or hear the stories. I like being able to go back on my documented adventures and recreate them with the information I posted. I like writing things down so I don’t forget them. Those reasons aren’t why I started blogging in the first place though. I started it because my author side wanted a personal place to share my thoughts and stories and experiences from my perspective. And I’m finally doing this again today for the first time in years.

Today in church, I taught a lesson on the Plan of Salvation. I believe everything that the LDS church teaches about the purpose of life, but there is still so much unknown, which I hate. I have a very rigid and skeptical way of thinking where I veer towards finding loopholes in any system. This is been a trait of mine that has been beneficial as much as harmful. Religious topics are probably where it’s easiest for me to spiral into “why this instead of this?” and “what about that person and their situation” and “I hate this because I don’t understand”.  I’ve leaked a few of the specifics out to my husband and to my best friend but for the most part I just go back and forth in my own head about minute details that can get me either real pumped or real upset.  There’s a song that speaks to me when I get in this place. It’s an LDS song by Doug Walker called “Things I Know”. I played this song in my class today and it resonated with me today as much, if not more, as it did years ago when I first heard it.

“I know babies come from Heaven/ I know God made their tiny hands and hearts/I know rainbows and roses are no accident/ neither are the sun, the moon, and stars.

So when I doubt/ and there are things in life I just can’t figure out/ I trust that God is in control/ and I hold on to the things I know.”

I’ve had undeniable experiences and feelings that testify of the truthfulness of God and his love for mankind. That doesn’t mean I know everything like I wish I did. When I start sinking, or when I jump into skepticism (Skepticism isn’t bad people! It can just cause some internal dilemmas), I try to hold on to those experiences and feelings that I know have been real for me.  Within the next little while, I plan to share some of those experiences, but I can’t right now because I’ve got to get some sleep for the stupid hustle and bustle of tomorrow.

One day when I live in a VW bus in the woods of who-knows-where without a to-do-list I will be able to blog like this more frequently because life will be slow enough to connect with my author side on the daily.  Until then…

August 27th

For the past 3 years, our little family has been living in the basement of the cutest, sweetest, retired couple. On Thursday, Harold- one of our landlords- unexpectedly passed away while gardening. A lot of the details are too tender to blog about but there are some things I need to remember, many of which I'd like to share. And I know this post is a lot of words, but I promise you'll benefit from reading it. 

• Gavin was a big part of the events of that day. We have heard multiple times, from multiple people, that Gavin was supposed to be there, and that the family is so thankful for the way Gavin handled things. Even though it was hard on him, we too are glad Gavin was able to be a support to Harold's wife and family through the very sad experience. 
• (This is the part that makes me cry) Wednesday night our power went out. It was about 7:00 pm. Harold and his wife were finishing up some yard work, and Gavin had run to the store to grab a forgotten dinner ingredient. It was too dark downstairs to hang out, so Owen and I went outside and sat in the yard until we got an update on the power situation. Gavin came home soon after the power went out. We didn't have electricity for a long time, so for about 30 minutes, Gavin, Owen, Harold, his wife, and I shot the breeze in their driveway. Such a tender mercy that we were able to spend time talking to him on his last day in this life. 
• His funeral was so inspiring!  Harold's life was gospel and family focused! He was always trying to improve himself in the gospel. The soles of his temple shoes were worn out (and there are very few places, even in the temple, that you can wear your shoes). He took notes during every sacrament meeting and general conference. He apologized to the priests quorum for not living up to expectations of a high priest, and said he would try harder. A few years ago, Harold read a talk from and LDS apostle encouraging saints to keep a journal of things they are grateful for. Harold took this to heard and had only missed two nights of writing in this journal since reading the talk, up until his last day on earth! One of his daughters read from this journal over the pulpit. Some of his counted blessings were silly, others serious or thoughtful.
• One night he wrote in his journal that he wishes he could afford to give everyone a Christmas gift, but since that wasn't possible, he would just have to give the gift of a smile and friendly "Hello" to everyone who crossed his path. He succeeded in giving this gift to us all!
• He has 5 daughters. Every one of his daughters (and son-in-laws, and a few more family members) wore homemade necklaces to his viewing. These necklaces were the cutest, most sentimental thing I have every seen. They were ugly! They were chains full of representations of things. There were charms and pictures and beads all over these dad-made necklaces. And I'm sure he made them with things he found around the garage! That's right- Harold made all these necklaces for his family members and added something to them every year! 
• When the casket was brought into the chapel and the congregation rose to honor the family, the family walked into the chapel and the line of people kept going and going. 5 daughters who all have families of their own! One speaker talked about Harold being rich. I loved being able to look around the chapel and see how rich he really was. His perspective on what really matters was incredible! 

Events like this make you REALLY REALLY THINK. Thanks for reading this post, if you've gotten this far. I know it wasn't well-written, I just put everything out there for my own future reading and references. We have been so blessed to know this man and we are thankful for the lessons he taught us! And you can't mention death without recognizing that the Savior has given all of us power to overcome the grave. So grateful for the atonement of Jesus Christ! 

Reebok Spartan First-timer!

So long! posting things in a timely matter! Or even in chronological order!

A couple weekends ago, I ran the Reebok Super Spartan Race in Soldier Hollow. I signed up because it sounded like a good idea. As the date got closer, I was dreading it more and more. I kept hearing how hard those races are! I only had time to train a couple times a week. Even the day of, as our time approached, I was feeling so anxious!

Well friends, I ended up loving it! LOVING IT! It was an 8.5 mile obstacle race. Hiking through the mountains of Midway, 26 obstacles, and running. They have obstacles like rope climbs, wall climbs, cinder block pulls, mud pits, barbed wire, bucket carries, tire flipping, cinder block pulling, spear throwing- you name it! If you can't do an obstacle (and you only get one chance!) you have to do 30 burpees before moving on. I had to do 60. Messing up on 2/26 obstacles isn't bad, right. One of those was the spear throw. Sorry Reebok, I've never thrown a spear before! Give me another chance!

 ^^This was the only obstacle besides the spear throw where I had to do burpees. Stupid gloves! I desperately want to try this one again!^^

^^uneven monkey bars^^

^^crawling under barbed wire. I saw the camera man and panicked and threw up a peace sign like a freaking ____^^^

If you are ever thinking of running a Spartan, I have some advice for you! I don't know if it makes me more or less credible that I just did my first one. Probably less, but maybe it makes me more convincing if you feel like an amateur too! 

• Say a prayer. I said a prayer before the race that I would be able to feel the spirit and find opportunities to share the love of Christ. This totally gave me the right attitude! When it got really hard to hike, I saw flowers popping up in the mountains, and they felt like a motivational gift from my higher power. I also had my eyes opened to strangers who needed help with obstacles. I helped a lot of people over a wall while waiting for my teammates; I gave a guy who was cramping my Powerade for the sodium; and a guy's feet fell off the monkey rope but I ran to catch his legs before they hit the ground, and helped him get his feet back on the rope. This prevented him from doing burpees. I'm not telling you this to toot my own horn. I'm telling you this to convince you to say a prayer.
• Hike! I was nervous because I was only up to about 8 miles of running on flat ground, and I had heard that the Salt Lake Spartan contained a lot of hills. I didn't know that my love of hiking was preparing me for this race! There are parts of the race where you basically hike straight up and straight down. Nobody runs this part, and it totals probably 3 miles. All my hikes definitely gave me an advantage here!
• Climb! I have this completely useless talent that I can climb anything. And I love climbing everything! Climb trees, monkey bars, fences- whatever you can find! This will prevent you from having to ask for help on a lot of obstacles. It will save you from a lot of burpees too!
• I wore Nike hot shorts, a breathable tank (NOT cotton), and a water bottle belt. I believe I had a very accommodating wardrobe. I'm glad I wore the belt because they only have 4 water stations. I took my belt off for the mud pits then just picked it back up when I was done. I also brought gloves, but I think they hurt more than they helped; hence, my first set of burpees. 
• Take a gas relief pill before the race. This helps get rid of the pre-game poops. Or the running craps feeling. TMI???
• Clif gel energy blocks. You're going to need at least one whole bar. Take as directed. I credit me finishing to these gels!
• Something salty. I've heard that salt helps muscle cramps. Remember how I said I brought a water bottle belt? Well I filled up the water bottle with Powerade and salt, then just refilled it with water at a water station.
• Bring fans! The course weaves in and out of the starting area, so spectators can watch you do all the obstacles, and take pictures and cheer you on. The only person there for us was a guy on my team's mom, but I was glad she was there for moral support! She was so nice to help us all out even though we had just met her!
• Work smarter, not harder. Use your team mates to help. Ask strangers for help. There's no point in working harder than you have to.
• Do your research. The experts have great things to say! Just Google Spartan advice and you'll learn all the tricks of the trade!

Let me know if you want a team for next year. Like I said, I seriously LOVED it! I would do another one in a heartbeat!

My Favorite Part of Christmas

Here's a glimpse of our awesome Christmas:

But this was my favorite part...

I have a brother serving a mission in Indonesia, a brother serving in the Philippines, and a sister serving in Florida.

None of them had met Little O before. 

We get to skype these missionaries on Christmas and Mother's day. I was SO EXCITED to skype and introduce them all to their new nephew! Seriously, I was so excited! 

Because my brothers are halfway around the world, we had to skype them really late at night. We kept waking O up for the phone calls. It's safe to say we wore him out!

Things I want to remember from the phone calls

• Jordan 'hypothermically' not wanting people greeting him at the airport.
• Apparently, in Indonesia, Katrin is pronounced 'Kathryn'
• Jake saying the sardines in tomato sauce aren't that bad unless there are bones in them

Other personal notes about Christmas

• "Are we bad parents if we don't get Owen anything for his first Christmas?"
• Gavin bought me new snowboard boots!!
• A guy from the Congo joined us at our family party and taught us how to catch and kill an anaconda.

Owen's Birth Story

I hear of emergency C-sections happening pretty frequently. I'm sure Saturday morning was just a day in the life for our doctors, but for Gavin and I, and probably for Owen too, the morning of the 15th was quite terrifying! 

The part about going into labor that I had been most anxious about was not knowing when to go to the hospital. I just knew that either a) I would go to the hospital saying I was in labor and they would tell me I was being a baby and needed to go home or b) I would be in labor but tell myself I was being a baby so I wouldn't go to the hospital and I'd end up having a baby on the side of the road. Around 2:30 am on Saturday I woke up with contractions and asked Gavin for a blessing. I wanted help handling the pain and knowing when to go in to the hospital. I'm so grateful for a husband that can take care of me this way! About 5 minutes and 3 contractions later, we grabbed our bags and went in.

• I put on leggings and a baggy t-shirt for the hospital. Gavin put on jeans and a polo because he "wanted to look nice for the baby". At all costs, Gavin avoids wearing anything but basketball shorts, so I got a kick out of the jeans and polo at 3 am thing.
• Gavin really wanted to run a red light on the way to the hospital because he had the most legitimate excuse in the book. Luckily, the few lights we hit were green.
• Walking to the car, Gavin tweaked his ankle. I gave him a nice talking to that I was the one in pain and he wasn't allowed to steal my thunder.

We got to the admit room around 3:15, where the nurses check mom and baby's heart rate, see how close to delivery you are, and decide whether to admit you or tell you to come back later. The nurse checked how far along I was and it was only a "1" (you have to be at a "10" to deliver), which was disappointing because that meant it was going to be a long time before I could pop out a baby.

Then I got heart rate monitors wrapped around me and had three strong contractions right in a row. Gavin was watching the monitor and said something to the affect of "does that mean the baby's heart rate just dropped?" As he was saying this, the nurse threw an oxygen mask on me, ordered me to get on my hands and knees, and started making phone calls. She looked panicked and said we weren't going home.

Another nurse came in the room and the crew wheeled me and the bed to a labor and delivery room. My doctor, the anesthesiologist, and a few other nurses showed up quickly. Nurses started working on getting an IV in my arm while my doctor started explaining that baby wasn't tolerating the contractions and we needed to do a C-section immediately. The anesthesiologist was also talking to me, having me sign papers, and agree to whatever he was going to do to me, which who knows what that was because I was in pain and scared for the baby and things were happening so fast! 

• At this point Gavin was sitting in the rocking chair, and his face was WHITE. Nurses made him lay on the cold floor and they got him some coke to prevent him from passing out. We've all given him crap about this already! The plus side of this was it gave me something to keep my mind off the pain and panic.

Nurses and doctors started undressing me so that I could stay in the position on my hands and knees to keep oxygen going to the baby. Then they wheeled me into the operation room and put Gavin on a chair next to me. 

The anesthesiologist had me sit up and face Gavin and roll my back so he could get the spinal thing in me. By "spinal thing" I mean the C-section version of an epidural where they insert a needle to make way for a tube to make way for a needle into my back. That's how I understood it at least. Physically, this was THE MOST MISERABLE part! 

Anesthesiologist warned me I was going to feel a poke. I braced myself for it but ended up shrieking and feeling a strong electric shock down my left leg. I got poked a few more times with doctor yelling "where'd you feel that one?" and me trying to explain (through my tear-filled oxygen mask) the electrifying pain down my left leg, then my right leg, then my butt, then my right calf.  I was teary through the entire process, but this was the part where I was actually sobbing. It was so. painful. and scary. I literally. literally. felt like I was the patient in a sucky game of operation. Words can't do this part of the story justice. I have yet to hear of anyone else being tazed by their anesthesiologist. I jumped every time a new spot on my back was pushed and the electric current hit me somewhere new. Gavin was trying to hold my arms down and keep me calm. Eventually the anesthesiologist stopped being nice and said "Madi. I need you to stop crying and hold still. We need to make this happen." Not that those are choice words to tell a pregnant lady in pain, but it brought me back down to earth for long enough that he could numb me. 

By 5:12 am, baby was out. Apparently the trouble came from the cord being wrapped around our boy's body twice and neck once, so his oxygen was cut off every time I had a contraction. The doctors were so in the zone, they forgot to tell us whether it was a boy or girl. Nurses finally made the announcement and I was surprised with how happy and excited I was with it being a boy! 

The crew started cleaning him up and putting me back together. For about the 15th time that night I asked if someone could fill me in what was going on. The anesthesiologist came and sat by me and talked me through the room: this is what they are doing with your baby and why, this is what they are doing with you and why. This put him back on my good side.

Around 5:30, the crew lifted me up onto another bed and wheeled me into a recovery room. For about 45 minutes I couldn't stop shaking. I was seriously wondering at what point would they consider me to be seizing. The nurses piled some hot blankets on me and even wrapped my head in some. It took a couple hours for my body to calm down and breath normal.

Gavin started calling/ texting family and friends. Somewhat of a "Boy Who Cried Wolf" story, but both our parents were at the hospital by 8:00 to meet their new grandson.

• Gavin's line of the day when telling the story was "That was not how I imagined it was all going to happen."

I'll journal more about our hospital stay eventually. I just needed to get this all in writing before I forgot the details. I'd say we are quite lucky to have a beautiful, healthy little boy home in his crib right now. The doctor said over and over how glad she was that we came to the hospital when we did. I'm so thankful for the spirit in our lives that got us there in time! 

Girls Camp

Location: Tanner Flats up Little Cottonwood Canyon, SLC, UT

Hike: Cecret Lake, Snowbird Resort

Yay for having the best calling in the church! I love working with teenage girls!

P.S. The video heading says August 2014 when really it happened in July. Pregnancy brain is a real thing people!

Note to Self

Dear Stranger,
Thank you! You taught me a valuable lesson at the grocery store and it's one I can pass on to others...
It's often you see parents at the grocery store dragging along their complaining kids and they all just look frustrated and fed up. All too easy, I can understand why this happens. 

There was a mom and a 3 or 4 year old daughter. The little girl had a cute squeaky voice and was talking away and touching everything and asking all sorts of questions. She'd ask questions like "what's a carrot and why is this one so big?" and "Is this an onion, why do people buy onions?" and instead of giving typical mom answers like "yeah, let's hurry" or "don't touch that, they make things taste better", I saw this mom crouch down and stare at the big carrot with her little girl and the mom explained to her daughter how carrots grow out of the ground. Their three item list probably took 45 minutes to check off but both mother and daughter seemed to be enjoying their shopping experience more than anyone else in the store. 

Note to self... be a mother like that!

Discover

First, I read...

http://www.langphotographers.info/2013/12/new-year.html

Then, I saw ...

Which made me decide to go about my 2014 resolutions the [new?] way.

I love learning. I love adventures. I love pushing myself.  

Explore, grow, learn, love.

Those words didn't fit.

My personal 2014 word of the year... DISCOVER.

I feel like this word encompasses all my goals- discover who I am and who we are. Discover the world around me and what the people in my life are worth. Discover how far I can push my self.

My goal is to wake up every day knowing there is something to be discovered, and to find that thing.

Happy 2014! 

I'm pumped.

Luke Bryan

The two most attractive men in this world are, in this order, Gavin Scott and Luke Byran. I JUMPED on the opportunity to go to the Luke Bryan concert with Gavin's siblings. I love going to concerts with friends to dance and sing along and have fun and act drunk without drinking but Gavin's family members are more reserved than my friends & I so I was a little nervous about going to a concert with them. I started having some anxiety about it on the way there so I said a prayer asking for help to have fun and be able to do what I wanted without caring what others thought of me. Prayer answered.
Starting with, I was the only one in our group who wanted to wait in line to try and win backstage passes, so it took a minute, but I worked up the confidence to do my own thing and guess what- it paid off! I won a backstage pass to meet the openers- Florida Georgia Line (but I know them as Tyler and Brian now haha).

The rest of the night went just as good. I was dancing and singing the whole time... by myself... but I enjoyed it! It was dark enough and loud enough and the crowd there was big enough that I could do whatever wanted without making a scene. OK except maybe I made a little scene during his song "Shake It", but besides that I would do it all over again. It was so fun acting confident and a little silly. I would do it all over again!

 The girls. I was already feelin' it.

 I swear. My husband is the only person in this world who wears fan gear, jeans, and tennis shoes to a country concert.

...and the whole group!

Have fun dancing to this song